Cool Breeze..

Truth be told, the new job doesn't really pay all that well... (actually, I haven't been paid at all so far... but I should get my first paycheck as of tommorrow..)

That is the down side. (.. well,.. the 'not paying all that well part', not the 'getting a paycheck tommorrow' bit... which is decidedly on the 'up side' portion of the 'GOOD / BAD' scale... !)

The up side is that they are all very nice people, nobody is nasty or overbearing, they let you know what is expected of you, and expect you to do it.

I am given as much rope as I need, and it is up to me to either do well or hang myself.

I have seen a few minor catastrophes take place, and not so much as a single feather was ruffled in anyone... these folks are more in line with my personality, I think... at least insofar as I have been able to get to know them. There isn't a lot of talk or banter in the office... we are mostly pretty busy, and we simply keep at it.

I have already been given my own key to the building, the security access code, and, I basically open up and run the place for the first hour or so..

If I am able to shine enough to actually make decent money in this place, this will be a fantastic place to work!! If not, it is still a fantastic place to work until I can find some way to pay all of the bills....

I used to work from 6:30-7:00 AM until 5:00-5:30PM every day, plus 6:30-7:00AM every other Saturday... this worked out to about 53 hours per week... it sucked. On top of that, I tended bar...

Now, I work from 7:00AM until 3:30PM, and no Saturdays! This leaves me plenty of time to work a part-time second job providing that I can find one that fits that schedule... I am actively looking, and hope to find something that helps me to make enough for us to get by....

In any case, things are better than they were, and I'm happy!!

China fully endorses the situation as well!


In other news, I have been working busily on a fairly difficult craft project, lately. I tend to be driven to this sort of thing, where I can focus my mind on an extremely narrow point, when things are difficult... 'things' being defined as the general prevailing circumstances of my current life situation.. whatever they happen to be. I have been 'sitting' (Zazen -- meditation) regularly with a local group of monks from the Rinzai Zen Order. When I lived in Korea, I studied Zen, which they call Soen, and took my first Ordination while there. The Order in Korea sent me information that was needed to confirm my ordination to these folks, and they are recognizing (at least partially...) my ordination as a monk in that order, and sort of transferring it over to this order (I don't think that this is an entirely accurate description; there is no such thing as 'transferring' the ordination... but they are recognizing my past practice, and jumping my learning progress accordingly. In any case, I was told that, as a monk, I should wear proper vestments. Tradition is that we sew our own, so, I have been working on mine diligently over the past weeks and months. I am putting the finishing touches on what the Rinzai folks call a 'Koromo' or 'Kolomo', (what I know ((in Korean)) as a 'Chang-Sahm). It's a little bit weird, because I have Korean garment patterns in my head.. so they are coming out as Japanese vestments with a Korean accent or something... nobody minds.

For all of you with question marks floating over your head right now... this is a separate discipline from the main order in which I am currently studying for ordination. There is no impediment or theological conflict, and both orders know and encourage me to learn what I may in my search for truth, in my efforts to purify and enlighten my heart, mind, and soul, and to live a life of contemplation, reflection, and simplicity, which is what I have chosen...

In any case, since my monastic day is supposed to be broken up into 'work self-support', 'work for mindful caretaking of the home/hermitage/monastery' (wherever I happen to make my dwelling), and 'work of the order', this offers me a way of expressing that work very nicely, since 'work of the order' is described as; "Teaching, social action, care of the environment, the care, maintenance, manufacture or design of 'liturgical objects' and/or 'priestly vestments, or other similar pursuits, ventures, or activity" and my project happens to fit the bill very nicely!

I have already made vestments for my main order, so this strikes me as slightly strange to be making other vestments... I feel like a monastic double-agent or something... I should design a sandal-phone!

At any rate, I love the work, I don't use patterns... I work entirely from the patterns and measurements that are inside of my skull.. and I derive a sense of detached, calm, satisfaction in the quiet diligence of my work.

Today, I should be able to put the finishing touches on the Chang-Sam/Koromo, and then I will move on to whatever the next project in the list is.... if my wife doesn't stave my head in first...

I am happy in my new job, it is refreshing... like a cool breeze after a period of hard work...

I am happy with my current state of affairs from a spiritual standpoint... I had begun to fear that I was drifting away from this facet of my life and becoming dangerously one-sided.... and now, I feel balanced and calm and whole.

I have to find a way to work with and within the universe in order to be able to pay my bills however... I don't want to be responsible for us losing this beautiful home that we have made... so, to a great degree, the pressure is on..

Anyway... wish me luck on finding the part-time work!! I really need it...

Perhaps I should think about participating in 'Project Affirmation' with Marcheline of Mental Meatloaf...

.. I have to do something, and soon.. that much is certain! I have this half-baked thought in my head that it shouldn't be as hard as it seems to be;.. I can do just about anything, and do it well, in the realm of administration, office management and flow, organization, writing, research, art, craft, verbal skills... or manual labor for that matter... it would seem that there should be zillions of businesses close by that would leap at the chance to have somebody who is reliable and capable to work for them... even on a part-time basis... but, it is turning out to be fairly difficult for me to find something... more so than I had anticipated, at any rate. Ach!! I'll find something.. I just have to think outside the box, I guess... keep yer fingers crossed, folks...





In Peace and Brotherhood,

Bear