A Mystic Heart...

I finally have a small break in the action... This past Saturday, at dawn, was my dedication ceremony into the religious order that I had posted about previously. For the next few days, I worked on a term paper, the 'final' exam, so to speak, the topic of which was to write about the calling that drew me to seek to enter into a contemplative order such as this. I was to write about my thoughts, feelings, and experiences starting from when I first began to 'bump up against' the calling that I was hearing in my heart, and to describe all that took place along the path from that first time until I eventually underwent the dedication ceremony, including any thoughts, feelings, or insights that I experienced during, or after the ceremony. This, as you can imagine, was quite a long and arduous path, and therefore, the paper was quite the longest that I have been required to write so far.

In any case, I have done so, turned it in, and am now awaiting the final 'ratification' of my dedication from the superior of my order. Once this has taken place, I will be a full-fledged member of the order, though a novice member, naturally...

The down-and-dirty part of the work will then take place, both externally and internally, as I work towards both spiritual enlightenment and ordination... which are two major milestones along my chosen path, internal, and external, respectively.

I feel that the experience, short though it has been so far, has changed me in some ways... small ways, but, large changes begin with small ones, I suppose...

Since my order is an 'eremetic' order, meaning that do not live within the confines of a monastery, but live in the community and follow our path by virtue of our own self-disclipline, this also means that I must work in order to pay the bills. Time is a precious resource, and, as a result of the somewhat hectic schedule of study, meditation, prayer, work, family (we are able to marry... I would not be in this order otherwise... as my wife is at the very center of my life, spiritual, emotional, temporal and all else...), etc., I have, regrettably, not been able to string enough minutes together into a line to be able to sit down and blog.

Since I am in 'wait for grade' limbo, and have no pressing assignments, other than a few reading assignments, I am able to do so now!! I missed you guys!!

One of the projects that I worked on during this portion of my training, was to construct my own set of devotional prayer beads. They are made of semi-precious stones, and took a bit of work. I think they are beautiful, and wanted to share them with you;



Here is a photo of me. Newly dedicated, and on the first wobbly steps upon this path. (Elysia/Marcheline made the beautiful Prayer Stole for me by hand! Its gorgeous!)



I'm off to eat some food. Please keep coming back. I'll be blogging a bit more regularly, I promise!!

In Peace and Brotherhood,

Bear

The Flow...

Lately I have simply been going along with the ebb and flow of my life..

I am working quite a bit, but I have managed to find a way to simply move through the day without contention or aggravation of note.

I get my work done, and move through the day as though I am a creature of air.. only gently disturbing those around me..

My studies are progressing, and I am doing fairly well at them. This makes me happy, because I love to learn, and I am learning a great deal.

I fall off the wagon periodically with the fitness plan, but I just dust myself off, and get back with the program.. in the long run, I am seeing progress.

My spirit is growing and soaring, and my heart sings and pulses with life.

I am content, and happy to spend my days at my beautiful wife's side, and to share my life with her as the days pass and the wheel of the year turns.

To the powers that be I can only offer profound thanks for this life of beauty and harmony that I have been given....

Just for the Record...

For those of you who frequent bars, go to weddings, engagement parties, bar/bat mitzvahs, holiday parties, anniversary parties, or who may otherwise come into contact with bartenders... specifically me - I just want to set a few things straight;

• There is no such wine as "Zinfendale" - just so you know... the name is ZinfenDEL.. as in HELL, which is where I am when I keep hearing this name mispronounced..


• When you hold a wad of money in your hand, get your drink order, and depart without leaving any tip at all, I would just like you to know that you haven't actually fooled me into giving you any better service... Everybody gets the best service that I can possibly offer... however, I do generally think that you are an asshole...


• If you aren't going to leave a tip, have the moral courage to simply not leave a tip, and leave it at that... Please don't give me lame excuses, tell me that you left it with the other guy or some other nonsense... there is no other guy... and I don't really care what your reasons are... either you have the money or you don't, and either you want to leave a tip, or you don't... case closed. It just seems tacky to discuss it... I work for tips. If you don't want to leave one, don't. I probably won't starve.


• Grooms... when you dance with your mother, please, PLEASE, PLEASE... Don't be grinding your genitals together, groping one another's asses, and sucking on each other's necks... it really freaks me out. Thanx.


• I don't know; whether the juniper berries were harvested in May or September/how many flurocarbons were released in the manufacture of the glass bottle/if the water is from an underground spring/what type of potatoes the vodka is made out of... I pour the stuff... I don't make it... I know what just about all of the various liquors/wines/cognacs/liquers are made of, approximately what they taste like, and how to make drinks with them... that's all. Really. Go away. (For the record, I have actually been asked these questions, and many other questions that are along the same lines... and have not received a SINGLE tip from any of the people who ask such questions. So. From my point of view, once you start asking this shit, I just wish you would go away.


• A screwdriver and vodka and orange juice are the same thing. I promise.


• I have no idea what you drank in Aruba last fall, even though it was green.


• I don't want your phone number. I will never, ever call you. I will never meet with you. I will certainly never have sex with you. And, honestly, I don't really want to even talk to you. The guy you came with should be able to help you out in that department, though... so keep a stiff upper lip!


• Most of you should never, ever, ever dance. But I suppose you already know that.


• Yes. I really DO need to see your ID, and NO, I'm not kidding. I don't care what your mommy or daddy say, I don't care if you are in the bridal party, and I don't care if I get fired over it... no ID, no alcohol. May I offer you a nice glass of milk, perhaps??