Somewhere along the way, recently, it seems that my co-workers and a number of our regular customers have somehow developed the idea that my HEAD is a good luck charm.
Every time they walk by me, they reach out and either rub my head, outright... or they simply give it a little touch, as if they are warding off demons or otherwise averting evil and thwarting hexes that have been directed at them in so doing.
To say that I am perplexed by this is a bit of an understatement.
My head is not particularly gifted in the way of granting wishes or bestowing luck (either good or bad) (... unless you count that one time when I had that really fucked up idea...), nor does it have (I hope!) much of a resemblance to Hotei's or Buddha's Belly.
I don't really get the whole 'Rub Bear's Head' thing... first it was total strangers in stores, libraries, and on the street, and now it seems to have become some obscene , macabre, bizarre fad.
Some folks give it the gentlest of rubs, while others seem to be trying to start a fire. I think some may be attempting to get a nice spit-shine going, actually...
I think I have a fairly nice head... it isn't mishapen or particularly disagreeable. No huge bumps, scars, or dents. No noticeable skin conditions or infestations. So, I suppose from that standpoint it is somewhat understandable that folks might want to rub it.
I just couldn't imagine walking up to someone that I either don't know at all, or know rather superficially and just rubbing their heads.
Perhaps I can balance a bowl of water on my head and see if they will start tossing coins in. It would be an easy way to make a few extra bucks, at least.
I have considered disabusing these folks of their ideas regarding my head. But, I have come to feel that it would be inhumane and cruel to take this obviously enjoyable and overall harmless pastime away from them. I have a responsibility to the public, it would seem, as a veritable shrine of good luck and karmic benevolence, the seat of which, I gather, is the back of my skull.
Funny that I never noticed it before...
I guess I should be glad they aren't sticking gum to my head or spray painting it with grafitti.
I could be worse. They might have decided to use my head as a voodoo doll...
2 comments:
you should put a real thin layer of vasoline or some other slightly sticky but not harmful gel on it and them let them touch away.
Now you know how pregnant women feel. People think it's ok to touch your stomach.
Don't you have a crew cut? Yeah, I'd want to touch it, too. I wouldn't, but I'd want to.
Now why is this so difficult to figure out?
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